Noise

One thing became apparent, there was no New Year's resolution rush. New people came and went, but the class size remained the same...small. I also noticed how critical it was to keep extremely quiet. There was hardly a sound from anyone. Imagine a group of people who did not cough, sneeze, snore or rustle as they shifted their body.
     As class ended the leader asked the group "why do you meditate?". A couple veterans provided answers that seemed almost to meet expectations. I shot up my hand and replied, "to be present", and got a disapproving look from the leader. Apparently newbies were not supposed to provide answers yet. The correct answer to the question was "merit". Huh? The purpose of meditation is to get brownie points? I clearly didn't understand.

Third Group

Again we went through the paces, stretching, guided meditation and silent meditation. I was able to reconcile my happy place/small spiky sun with the two finger widths above the navel with some creative imagery. The small spikey sun would float in front of me, then traverse the 7 bases to rest in the "center". I then brought the happy place image into view as the landscape the sun would reside in, which was in the two "finger widths" location. As I figured out this puzzle, I did notice a deeper sense of relaxation which implied I was on the right track

Commitment

So after the second group, I took the plunge. For a nominal fee, I joined the group for a year. Paying on-line with my pay-pal account, seemed a little impersonal, but it was quick and I had the feeling of commitment. When meditation day arrived, I was excited and in an experimental mind set. The bleacher seat chairs were causing my back to ache. I decided to bring a small pillow to act as a lumbar support. Perhaps I could design meditation accessories? Has anyone come up with a meditation chair with a built in adjustable lumbar support? I was also excited to see some new faces, fresh beginners. I had to bite my tongue not to eagerly strike up a conversation and ask too many probing questions. I would leave this to the professionals.

Happy Endings

As we finished the question and answer session, packed up and left the building, I was again struck by the relaxed, lighter than air feeling. Two for two. I had to come back a third time, perhaps I was hooked? Still, I felt I had only scratched the surface. Something was telling me there was more than just relieving the stress of the day. Exactly what, I didn't know yet.

Next Question Please

Finally someone asked another question. "I have wondered.... you know how you can cut a worm in half and it can regenerate into two worms...does it have one soul, or two?" The venerable paused, gave an odd look and then responded. "Why do you worry about such questions?" "Your focus should be on proper mediation". He paused again and answered, "one soul". I liked this guy. Practical. He may have been wearing an orange robe, sitting in the half lotus position, but he seemed to have his head on straight.

Question and Answer Venerable Style

Now the floor was open for questions. Silence echoed through the room. Maybe this was normal for a meditation group, but I thought I would get the questions going. I raised my hand. A translator converted my words into either the ancient language of Pali, or maybe Thai. "I am having trouble focusing for any length of time on keeping my mind still, any suggestions?" And there you had it, the classic beginners question. You hear it over and over and over. Still he answered me sincerely. "You have not found an object you are comfortable focusing on. Your mind is not still." So my take-away for this night was to revisit my "happy place" and reconcile the meditation place/object and the recommended center two finger widths above the navel. Finally another question was raised...

Introductions

We were warned that the "Venerable" (buddhist monk) would be guiding the meditation and there would be a question and answer period afterwards. Since he did not speak English, only Pali and Thai, another member would translate. This gave it a far more mystical and weighty edge. As we proceeded through the guided meditation first in Pali, then in English, I was confronted with a dilemma. We were told to think of a "happy place" to focus our thoughts, and place our focus on a round object within the "happy place", preferably a crystal ball. I chose a small spiky sun about the size of my fist. We were also told to focus our awareness on a spot two finger widths above the navel. Here was the conflict, I was having trouble concentrating on the sun and two finger widths above the navel. It was like trying to focus on an object in front and behind you at the same time. I gave up on the stomach and focused on the meditation. Next would come question and answer period.

"Good Evening" said the guy in the orange robe

     A week later I headed back to the class. I removed my shoes, walked inside and was startled by a man in an orange robe who politely said, "Good Evening". I replied "Good Evening" back, and walked into the meditation hall. I looked for more orange robes. Perhaps I didn't get the memo on the new dress code? No, there were no orange robes, just the same group as last time. As we started preparing for meditation, I kept a wary eye out for the orange robes. It was going to take an introduction before I would see any arrive.

The decision to go back

     Why wouldn't I go back? I left happier than when I arrived. I didn't spend any money, take any medicine, or have a drink. While the feeling I left with didn't last more than a couple hours, I was looking forward to the next visit. Could I repeat the effect, extend it, or realize some additional benefit? I added the time to my google calendar and clicked the repeat setting.

Dedication

     After the guided meditation, there was silence. My mind screamed for action. Images flashed through my brain trying to find a home. Slowly, the level of activity in my mind decreased and I found small pockets of calm. Before I knew it, the guide requested us to open our eyes. I slowly unlocked my stiff legs, moved my body back into position and glanced around the room. People seemed to be going through the same motions as myself. Waking from a dream.
      As I was coming back to the present, a funny thought ran through my mind. I pictured my wife asking, "Did you make any friends at meditation?". My response was "uh, don't know. They don't seem to talk much." My thoughts were interrupted by the moderator announcing that there was a video of a monk talking about meditation. She gave us some background which included that she had copied this at her mom's house, but her mom stressed her out and she only made a few copies. Her Mom stresses her out? Wait, I thought meditation made you stress free? I sensed a flaw.
      Still, as I put my shoes on and walked towards my car, I felt lighter, happier. Could this be? How long would it last? I knew then that I would be back next week and probably the week after that.