Goals

As a rather goal oriented person, I have set out my 2013 Goals/Resolutions for the year. One in particular gave me difficulty. On the task list on my iPhone, was simply "meditation". What pray tell is a "meditation" goal? Is the very essence of "being present,"not setting goals? I haven't come up with an answer yet, but I framed some possible responses.

Fold

As we folded brochures before class for the upcoming retreat with a high ranking venerable, I tried to practice my mindfulness. "Be patient," I thought. Crease, fold, crease, fold, become one with the paper, the process.  Nope- not working, time to move on. New members had arrived and the leader quizzed them with the usual questions. What is your name, have you ever meditated, what is your interest in meditation? It was surprising the number like me who came because they had passed by the meditation center for months, years, and had finally made the plunge to check it out.
   This time I had felt optimistic about my meditation and was rewarded with a more prolonged pleasant experience. I had been practicing on not stopping in the middle of an intense, almost weightless feeling by suddenly jolting back to consciousness and thinking "wow, what was that?" and losing the state in the process. Normally the benefits of meditation lasted a couple hours after we finished, but this time I felt vestiges for a day and a half. I also noticed that my aches and pains from sitting in the half-lotus position had also diminished. This was a first.

TED

TED Meditation

Yesterday on my TED downloads this lecture on meditation popped up. In summary it describes trying to find time to think about nothing in a chaotic world constantly vying for our attention.

A year and a chocolate

So, first session of the year. For some reason I am a little nervous as I enter the meditation hall thinking back on a year of meditation classes. I go through the motions of taking off my coat, shutting off my cell phone and positioning myself on the meditation chair. I scan the room looking for the regulars (now called core by the teacher) and pick out a few. "This is my year anniversary of meditating," I chatter away. No special kudos from anyone, maybe a smile and a nod. Like the past year, we start with stretches and then the  introduction of people new to the group. Unfortunately, there was no magical transition into a better meditation after the year marker, but all in all, not bad. As we put our chairs away, I again chatted about passing the year milestone. "Wait," said the leader's new husband, "I bestow this gold coin token upon you at this momentous occasion." He pulled a large gold coin out and handed it to me. "And best of all," he continued, "you can eat it because it is chocolate!" I had to laugh. This was the best response.

2013

After a little hiatus from the blog, I am back. Its New Years day, and in a few days it will have been a year since I started the meditation journey. Hard to believe I have kept at it this long. I really thought I might last 3 months at the most, but no, its been a year. What have I learned in the past year? Besides my surprise that I have kept at it, and will continue into the next year, that some things were easy and some were harder than I imagined. What I found easy, was the immediate benefit I felt after every meditation session. On the hard side, was getting that same feeling when meditating at home. I also had the belief, that once I had a good meditation experience, I would be able to get to that feeling every session and improve upon it. Big mistake and lots of frustration! So, in 2013, I will continue the journey, focus on the humor,  and try to improve myself to the next level (whatever that is). Onward!

Party Boy to Monk

After the Monk told us he used to be a "party boy", he described his journey to "Monk-dom". This started with a vision and a sense of calling. A recognition of the false promise of material goods, and the virtuous life of meditation. He was young, with more energy than the older monks, but the tell-tale smile of someone who is at peace and finds humor in the little ironies of life. While he wasn't quite my style, he was a refreshing change from the other older monks.

 

Party Boy

     As I waited for meditation to start, I realized the leader was always present. She was never sick. I had heard some tangential comments about meditation reducing your chance of being sick, but this sounded like more of the special powers monks held. It turns out there may be some scientific evidence. Since meditation reduces stress, and stress hormones are linked to your body's immune system, there is a correlation between the two. Who knew?
      Next the leader informed us that a new venerable would begin guiding us in meditation. When he walked down and bowed to the buddha, I was shocked to see how young he looked. He turned to face us, and began to tell the story of how he had become a Monk. "I was a party boy," he started. "Hmm, this should be interesting," I thought.